The Incident at Chez Pierre

[PAGE 89 - FOUND IN DUMPSTER BEHIND CHEZ PIERRE, AUTHENTICITY: 10/10]

"1997. Paris. Chez Pierre. Three Michelin stars and the ego to match.

Chef Pierre himself told me my consommé was "pedestrian." PEDESTRIAN. I spent fourteen hours on that stock. Fourteen hours of my life I'll never get back, roasting bones, skimming foam, clarifying with egg whites like some kind of medieval alchemist.

You know what I did?

I smiled. I nodded. I said "Merci, Chef."

Then I put pineapple in his mise en place. Not a lot. Just enough.

[REDACTED - INTERNATIONAL INCIDENT]

I am not allowed back in France."

— Biographer's Note: When asked about this incident, Chef Pierre claimed to have "no memory" of anyone named Snackhole. The twitch in his left eye suggested otherwise.

From the original Snackhole Leaked Pages collection. A work of fiction.